I'm having one of those days where things have not turned out how I'd expected and as a result have left me with that sick/heavy feeling in my gut. I hate this feeling. I want to cry and yell (and probably swear a bit) but I know it's not worth getting so upset over. Although the fault does not fall solely on me, a lot of it does. I should have seen this coming and tried to make things right before now. I want to go back and change it all...but I can't. It's done. All I can do now is move forward and try to rectify it all. The next few days are going to be taxing. I'm going to need all the confidence I can muster to front up and deal with the consequences. Part of me believes this will make me stronger and more resilient, another part wants it to teach me that I need to be more responsible for my path, yet I can't help feeling that this may just have been the thing that knocks me down for good and I am too burnt out to get back up. I want to succeed yet I believe I am unworthy of it. I want to make it to the end, to see all this hard work though. I can't help feeling, I'm losing faith in myself.
Showing posts with label lowlights. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lowlights. Show all posts
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Highlights, Lowlights and Down lights
So, I haven't posted in about a week! I hate that, as I promised myself if I started a new blog I would be fully committed, and I feel as if I've failed already. Time has just gotten away from me this week.
Excuses aside, I figured I'd do a little check in and update you on what I have been up to this week. It's been a doozy!
Fri - Sam and I found out that our friend and university lecturer Dr Marilyn Meier Kapavale had passed away. A magnificent pianist, doting mother and dear friend; she was a truly inspiring woman, who put her family first and never ceased to bring a smile to my face every time I saw her. I'll cherish every memory.
Sat - After a wonderful night celebrating the end of semester with friends, I spent most of the day pottering around the house and enjoying a relaxed and chilled day with Sam and the animals. This was probably the easiest day I've had in the last week...I miss its simplicity. We also capped our internet today...it's gonna be a low, slow week ahead!
Sun - It's rare for me to have a weekend off, especially a Sunday, so Sam and I woke up early for some brekky and a trip to the markets! It was a beautifully crisp winter morning (unusual for me to enjoy as I dread chilly winter weather) with great food and company.
* I have a post in the works with some pictures from our morning, so check back soon!
Mon - Sam and I had planned to get away for a couple of days to Byron Bay, but after a few unfortunate family issues that put a damper on our trip. I have to admit that I was (and still am, to be honest) upset that we didn't get to spend some time away, but I'm sure we'll get another chance soon. We're madly saving at the moment to make our first overseas trip together in early 2013, to visit some of Sam's closest friends who live in the States. I'm incredibly excited for Sam, as she's had some of these friends for 5 or more years and they've never met in person, but often talk everyday via blogs and boards. We're so excited!
Tue - I had the most amazing bubble bath in the evening! I hadn't had a hot, bubbly bath in a couple of months and I have to say, it was divine! I set up the laptop, popped in a movie, filled up the tub and soaked my worries away for a good hour or so. It was made all the lovelier when Tig (our dog) decided that she would keep me company and slept on the bath mat. Precious.
Wed - I changed my very first down light! It has taken me a long time to get around to doing it but I can now proudly say I have done it! I've had an incredible fear of changing the down lights in our house for a while now...the thought of creepy-crawlies coming our of the fixture-yuck! A few weeks ago the light on our front stoop blew and the only time I'd remember to change it was when I went to turn it on at duck. It finally got to the point that not having a front door light was getting beyond annoying, and slightly dangerous.
Now that I've overcome that hurdle, there's handful of blown bulbs with my name written all over them!
Thu - Today I was back at work, which I really enjoyed as I like the routine of getting up early for work and then spending the evenings at home, cooking dinner and relaxing. Tonight, while Sam sleeps, I have been chasing the two kittens around the house and doting on them as if they were my very own babes. It's been beautiful watching them grow from newborns to plump-bellied, wobbly-legged 5 week old kittens. The next 5 weeks will be bitter-sweet as we prepare them to go off to new families who will get to enjoy more of their soft purrs and quirky personalities.
I hope you've had a wonderful week so far! and I promise to be back again soon! :)
Fri - Sam and I found out that our friend and university lecturer Dr Marilyn Meier Kapavale had passed away. A magnificent pianist, doting mother and dear friend; she was a truly inspiring woman, who put her family first and never ceased to bring a smile to my face every time I saw her. I'll cherish every memory.
Sat - After a wonderful night celebrating the end of semester with friends, I spent most of the day pottering around the house and enjoying a relaxed and chilled day with Sam and the animals. This was probably the easiest day I've had in the last week...I miss its simplicity. We also capped our internet today...it's gonna be a low, slow week ahead!
Sun - It's rare for me to have a weekend off, especially a Sunday, so Sam and I woke up early for some brekky and a trip to the markets! It was a beautifully crisp winter morning (unusual for me to enjoy as I dread chilly winter weather) with great food and company.
* I have a post in the works with some pictures from our morning, so check back soon!
Mon - Sam and I had planned to get away for a couple of days to Byron Bay, but after a few unfortunate family issues that put a damper on our trip. I have to admit that I was (and still am, to be honest) upset that we didn't get to spend some time away, but I'm sure we'll get another chance soon. We're madly saving at the moment to make our first overseas trip together in early 2013, to visit some of Sam's closest friends who live in the States. I'm incredibly excited for Sam, as she's had some of these friends for 5 or more years and they've never met in person, but often talk everyday via blogs and boards. We're so excited!
Tue - I had the most amazing bubble bath in the evening! I hadn't had a hot, bubbly bath in a couple of months and I have to say, it was divine! I set up the laptop, popped in a movie, filled up the tub and soaked my worries away for a good hour or so. It was made all the lovelier when Tig (our dog) decided that she would keep me company and slept on the bath mat. Precious.
Wed - I changed my very first down light! It has taken me a long time to get around to doing it but I can now proudly say I have done it! I've had an incredible fear of changing the down lights in our house for a while now...the thought of creepy-crawlies coming our of the fixture-yuck! A few weeks ago the light on our front stoop blew and the only time I'd remember to change it was when I went to turn it on at duck. It finally got to the point that not having a front door light was getting beyond annoying, and slightly dangerous.
Now that I've overcome that hurdle, there's handful of blown bulbs with my name written all over them!
Thu - Today I was back at work, which I really enjoyed as I like the routine of getting up early for work and then spending the evenings at home, cooking dinner and relaxing. Tonight, while Sam sleeps, I have been chasing the two kittens around the house and doting on them as if they were my very own babes. It's been beautiful watching them grow from newborns to plump-bellied, wobbly-legged 5 week old kittens. The next 5 weeks will be bitter-sweet as we prepare them to go off to new families who will get to enjoy more of their soft purrs and quirky personalities.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)